Jerry, You Deserve Better

Those of you who know me also know Jerry. Jerry is my 2005 A4 (his name is from my old VA plates "JRE-5984") and we've been through a lot together. Three weeks after I got him, I crashed him into someone on the Roosevelt Bridge in DC, we've been back and forth between DC and New York many a time, and I've lost count of the blow-outs he's had.

For all that I have done to him (and it's been a lot), he has served me well. He might have an ugly, yellow-paint-crusted dent on his front fender and might leave a lingering gasoline odor, but he has been an steadfast horse and I hope when I put him out to stud he gets someone who treats him better than I have.

You see, I've been horrible to Jerry. It wasn't his fault he got me as his owner, it was his misfortune. I was brought up in an environment where the word "consequences" was usually followed by "schmonsequences" and when the stuff hit the fan, you could always just throw money at the problem and it would probably go away. I am not using it as an excuse, but this upbringing has left me with an incredibly impulsive side, which is one of the largest obstacles I am trying to overcome.

So, late in his career with me, Jerry needs a fair amount of work done that, of course, is not covered by warranty. I am paying the piper (literally) and, like with so many other occurrences throughout this period of self-reflection, I am looking at it as another form of penance for my hitherto blasé attitude toward responsibility and consequences. So, to all the car doors, walls, doors, door jambs, and bones (yes, I have even broken a bone or two in frustration and/or indifference), I apologize.

Another consequence of my upbringing is a complete and utter inability to admit when I make a mistake or do wrong. As such, I have been challenging myself to think through every decision I make and ask myself, "Did I do the right thing?" I realize the danger of doubting myself, but being over-confident can be just as dangerous. My hope is that asking myself this simple question will make me a better husband, friend, son, brother, son-in-law, and citizen.

I challenge everyone to take some serious time to self-reflect and identify areas for improvement. Constructive criticism is so important, especially when it comes to constructively criticizing yourself. Plus, it feels great to set goals for yourself and track your progress.

So, be nice to your car, your walls, your doors and door jambs. It might seem right at the time to kick, punch, or ram them, but paying for the damage is never right, literally or figuratively. Have a great weekend!