Saturday

Since today is my last day of "freedom", I decided to sleep in this morning. And I slept. I mean, I really fucking slept. Until after 9:00. 9:11, actually.

Of course, I didn't sleep all the way through. Last night's partaking of whiskey and rum completed its evolution inside of my body at about 5:00 and the sugar yielded was trying to pull me out of bed. I tossed and I turned for about two hours, anxious; "I should get up," I scolded myself. "I don't even know when their flight is. I need to get going."

At 7:00, I texted R. "Good morning. When is a good time to call?" My trepidation remains after last night's alarm episode. Nothing.

I laid down with Teddy and we both fell into sleep, beautiful REM sleep, with messed up, yet beautiful dreams for two more hours. Oh my God. This is what 2004 was like: I can sleep and wake up when I want to. Wow. What fucking liberty.

At 9:11, I said, "Enough is enough! Outta bed!" I marveled at what I just did and popped open the plantation shutters. Teddy and I descended the stairs, brought light to the kitchen and the family room. "I'm gonna make coffee! Then I'm gonna go through the mail!" The prospect of performing mundane banalities at my leisure was one step short of orgasmic. Then the phone rang. It was R's cell phone.

I'm doing my best not to sound hungover. I stumble into a rambling explanation that I texted earlier and that I never heard from her. It sounds like she's in the car, so they must be on their way to the airport. She's chewing something, probably her breakfast she didn't get to eat. She was not given the same gift of time that I was. She said it was a horrible night; Max was up from 11:30 to 1:00 and woke up Sammy, though the latter put himself back to sleep. I need to remember not to tell her I took a two hour nap this morning.

After we got off the phone, I looked around the kitchen. Then I walked into the family room and took a look in there. All of a sudden, the familiar started creeping in; the reality of purpose and expediency started to pick up. I felt it picking me up, picking the house up. The sun is shining in on the toys and the kids' beds, highlighting them. The refrigerator is empty, calling out for replenishment. The list starts being made. A deadline, an expiration, is in sight.

OK, let's get this shit together. But, first let's sip some coffee on the porch and make some waffles, soaking in this feeling for just a little longer.